Perhaps it is my stubborn German heritage or maybe I have a subconscious inferiority complex, but I have recognized a pattern of resisting help.
It is like I have an instant visceral response to immediately say, “NO!” to someone who kindly offers to assist me, before my brain even comprehends their benevolence, and the positive impact their good deed would have on me.
I have always wanted to be an “independent, confident woman!” I still desire to have this identity. I have recently pondered though, does accepting or asking for help take away from this? I do not think so. In fact, I think this makes us stronger. Accepting service from others can allow us to focus more. Our vulnerability can strengthen our connections and it makes others feel good, too. Think of how you feel when someone accepts your help. You feel honored and fulfilled. Others genuinely want to support you.
Sometimes we are crystal-clear on what we need. Please, unapologetically, communicate this. Other times, we do not even know where to begin. That is okay. You can say JUST that. And, the next time someone proposes a solution or a helping hand to…run an errand, finish a project at work, wash the dishes, tuck in your kiddo, bring in your mail, pick up dinner, etc., I invite you to take an itty-bitty moment to consider saying, “yes.”
Last night I was not feeling well. Jason offered to go to the store for me. At first, I rejected him and insisted I was “fine enough” to go… but then sat and continued to feel worse. When he asked again, I accepted. When he suggested he could pick up dinner on his way home, I requested Chinese food. I am learning.
We enjoyed take-out from China 1 (1164 W Gannon Dr, Festus, MO). My fortune was: “Great minds must be ready not only to take opportunities, but to make them.”
Tying this all together: it is wise for us to acknowledge and accept help when an opportunity presents itself, as well create our own opportunity to ask and receive help. Your Festus-area community loves you and we all want to help.
Another quick, yet insightful read on this concept of our identity:
